Collaborative Divorce Attorney / Lawyer Bloomfield Hills

Collaborative Divorce Attorney - Practice
When two people who, having had a loving relationship and a bond through marriage, drift apart for whatever reason and one or the other or both decide to get a divorce, the legal system immediately sets them up as adversaries. During a divorce, trust in the other spouse usually breaks down first. Each spouse “fills in the blanks” about what the other spouse is doing or planning and each spouse begins thinking of ways to “retaliate” or “hurt” the other spouse in response. Needless to say, spouses in this situation do not necessarily “fill in the blanks” in a very positive way about the other spouse or about the other spouse’s attorney.

The resulting actions and reactions, between the former couple in what is naturally an emotionally charged and paranoid event, fling them into a full blown freight train heading at high velocity into a solid brick wall. Who gets hurt in the long run? Those precious little beings who are half Wife/Mother and half Husband/Father – the couple’s children are caught in the crossfire with no voice in the matter.
Collaborative Divorce Attorney / Lawyer Bloomfield Hills

What if there is a better way? There is a better way. A process founded by family law attorneys who saw the devastation to families after a “scorched earth – take no prisoners” approach to divorce. After litigating divorces year after year, the founders of the process realized: There has to be a better way!

So, Collaborative Practice; Collaborative Divorce; or Collaborative Law came into existence. Family law attorneys with like minds and with the assistance and the advice from mental health professionals dealing with their clients’ children and families came together to start a better way to get divorced. Twenty years ago the process was founded by attorney, Stu Webb. Another attorney, Pauline Tesler, and mental health professional, Peggy Thompson, started an organization ten years ago that is now international: The International Academy of Collaborative Professionals (“IACP”). This website and the Collaborative Practice Institute of Michigan (“CPIM”), founded in 2004, provide information and answers to questions regarding this process.

What is this approach?

First of all, attorneys, mental health professionals and financial professionals take specialized training to learn how to assist couples through divorce with this process. The idea is a team approach in an effort to assist people with the emotional and financial issues of divorce with each party having the representation of a trained attorney, committed to the process and guiding the couple throughout. For attorneys, this is a paradigm shift from the gladiator mentality for which so many are famous or infamous.

Parties seeking divorce must be provided with options, thus this firm does a thorough screening of clients and provides them with the information to make an informed decision on how to proceed.

Once a couple decides they want to proceed with a Collaborative Divorce, each collaborative attorney meticulously screens and provides their respective client with comprehensive information regarding the process. At that time, a 4-way meeting is scheduled. At this meeting, the parties and attorneys thoroughly review and sign an enforceable contract to resolve all of the issues necessary for finalization of the divorce without going to court.

The contract states that if the process breaks down, the collaborative attorneys must withdraw from the matter and cannot represent their clients in court or any future proceedings and the parties must seek new attorneys. This provision is the most important feature of the collaborative process, because it provides both the parties and attorneys with financial incentive to stick with the process and come to resolution. The mindset from the beginning of the process and throughout is NOT winner take all, instead it is a process of cooperation, dignity, respect and creative solutions. The contract also requires full disclosure of all information, a financial status quo, no removal of children, and agreement not to transfer or dissipate assets or incur additional unnecessary debt.

The two clients and two attorneys work in 4-way meetings, taking a team approach in a transparent fashion with the ultimate goal of creating win-win resolutions. The attorneys model effective communication, active listening skills, interest-based negotiations, reframing of issues and creative problem-solving techniques. The parties agree to deal in good-faith, with respect, integrity, and a determination to come to resolution as a group.

This is not necessarily an “easy” process, but it requires commitment and difficult work for all team members involved. The process deals with difficult emotional issues which would simply be ignored in the traditional divorce approach. Parties learn to deal with the emotional issues in order to more fully participate in the 4-way meetings with attorneys.

After an initial meeting, mental health professionals are added and serve as divorce coaches to assist the parties with these emotional aspects of divorce. The coaches facilitate effective communication during meetings. A neutral child specialist (mental health professional) serving as a child advocate or assisting with parenting issues may also be needed.

All Meetings are organized with the attorneys taking turns keeping minutes and the parties and their attorneys setting an agenda for the next meeting, with no “surprise” issues coming to the table. The group will review whether one or the other or both parties need a financial coach; or a financial neutral may be added to assist with the division of assets, financial needs, tax implications, retirement plans, business valuations, health insurance issues; or financial education for one or both parties. These collateral professionals are regularly brought into litigated divorce matters as experts for one or both sides, but when used in a court oriented setting, they become the necessary weapons of the attorney for the purpose of destroying the other side’s view of facts or legal issues and this process is often coined, “The Battle of the Experts!”

In the collaborative process, the multidisciplinary team is just that – a team with the same goal, i.e., helping to further the “win-win” resolution of the restructured family during and after the divorce.

Another benefit to this process is the self-determination of the parties. People who actively participate in their own settlements are more committed to adhering to the settlements and are more likely to seek a similar route to problem solving in the future. On the other hand, when a third party, such as a judge, referee or arbitrator makes a decision after a hearing on issues or when lawyers settle divorces “on the courtroom steps,” people often end up re-litigating their divorces far into the future. We’ve all heard it said: “He or she just wants his or her day in court!” Unfortunately, litigants to a divorce soon find out that a day in court is not at all what they imagined or anticipated because judges simply do not have enough time to discover everything about each party and the particularities of their family and usually end up ‘splitting the baby in half.’ The old statement: “Judges are successful when both parties are dissatisfied with the result,” is not really far from truth. In contrast, with the collaborative process, people roll up their sleeves and work hard toward problem solving, resulting in a sense of satisfaction, accomplishment and moving the restructured family in the right direction for his or her future.

Advantages of Collaborative Divorce

  • The parties are in control. Attorneys are present to assist, but the spouses are responsible for negotiation and the ultimate settlement as the most important members of the team.
  • Meetings are organized with the attorneys taking turns keeping minutes and the parties and their attorneys setting an agenda for the next meeting, making for no “surprise” issues coming to the table.
  • Attorneys provide advocacy, model effective communication, provide creative problem-solving, assist with needs-based negotiations and help with informed decision making.
  • Positive solutions are possible because the mistrust and acrimony of threat of litigation reduces anxiety and fear.
  • Finalization of the divorce can be accomplished in a shorter period of time.
  • The process is efficient and is less costly and time-consuming than litigation.
  • The settlement is not “cookie-cutter;” it is tailor made to the specific needs for restructuring the family.
  • Collaborative settlements are much more detailed and complete than possible under the litigation model.
  • The Collaborative Process assists couples for future problem-solving by reducing stress, identifying priorities for both parties, assisting with better communication, and learning how to find creative solutions when future issues arise. This creates a superior environment where the restructured families can thrive after the divorce.

Disadvantages of Collaborative Divorce

  • When there is no court deadline, collaborative cases can linger until final settlement is reached.
  • In matters involving domestic violence, mental illness or disorders, substance abuse, Collaborative Practice may not be appropriate.
This firm is educated in collaborative practice and facilitative mediation and prides itself in offering clients every possible option available to assist them through the difficulties of divorce and post-judgment of divorce issues. We believe in restructuring families, not destroying them. Parties may be divorcing their spouses but not their children. Former spouses will always be Mothers and Fathers far into the future. Specialists in children’s emotional and mental health all agree that children need both parents.
Explore our website and contact us today to schedule a free initial consultation.
DANIELLE A. SMITH PLLC
MICHIGAN DIVORCE OPTIONS
Attorney and Counselor
Mediator and Collaborative Practice
33 Bloomfield Hills Parkway, Suite 230
Bloomfield Hills, Michigan 48304

Phone: 248.519.2323
Facsimile: 248.282.0326; 248.792.5094
 
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